She Said WHAT?

Wow, it's been WELL over a week since my last real post. So sorry everyone.

You know what I love? Celebrity feuds, and more importantly, the ferocity with which fans take sides and fight. This past year I transitioned from high school student to college student, and found that one of the largest changes in my life was the amount of drama involved. High School (and don't get me wrong, I LOVED high school when I was in it) was full of drama, he-said-she-said, and general gossip fed fighting. Sure there's some drama at school now, but nowhere on the scale of the insults, "backstabbings", and unexplained anger/jealousy present at the lovely Bloomington High School (home of the Raiders).

While I have entered a drama-lite stretch of life, I still revel in the idea that celebrities, people who in theory should be busy all the time either a) working on movies/shows/music or b) spending their loads of cash have time to have public battles with other celebrities, who they probably have met only once or twice.

As far as I can tell, there are two types of celebrity feud.

1) MEDIA INSPIRED
Editors, radio hosts, bloggers, and VJs all tend to create conflict between celebrities that share similarities. In most cases the two will actually have no ill will towards the other, and in most cases are simply both vying for the same demographic. Cases in point include the 90s "feuds" between Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera or *NSYNC and The Backstreet Boys (and you just know 98 Degrees wanted in on some of the feuding action!). Or a *little* more recently that whole bizarre love triangle between Lindsay Lohan, Aaron Carter, and Hilary Duff (which I'm sure Lohan wanted NO part of). These feuds are entertaining enough, but the fans who rally to these causes are usually fanboys/girls who because of their love for one celebrity refuse to consider the idea that they may enjoy an entertainer popped out from the exact same mold.

2) QUOTABLE DRAMA
Now THIS is what I'm in to. I'm talking about feuds that start when one celebrity opens their mouth for a second and says something stupid about another star, either forgetting that everything celebrities do is recorded, or hoping to stir up some publicity. I suppose this is also started when celebrities choose to open their legs rather than their mouths (ANGELINA). One of the most recent that I absolutely LOVED was that scandalous photo of Hannah Montanna. Er. Miley Cyrus.

Vanity Fair (with a little help from Annie Leibovitz) vs. Miley Cyrus and Disney
As if you hadn't heard by now, this one is a doozy. Miley Cyrus and parents agree to do a Vanity Fair photo shoot with famed celebrity and fashion photographer Annie Leibovitz. Miley is photo'd bare back/shoulder with a blanket wrapped around her. The picture was not sexual at all (and not just because Miley Cyrus is not a sexy girl), but Miley freaked out about it (after Disney and the media did). Miley goes on to talk about how she is "embarrassed" by the photo and can't believe how it turned out. Annie tries to apologize, saying that she thinks people are misinterpreting it (grow some balls Annie) and Vanity Fair responds with, "Miley's parents and/or minders were on the set all day. Since the photo was taken digitally, they saw it on the shoot and everyone thought it was a beautiful and natural portrait of Miley." This mag does not mess around. After all other parties try to avoid placing blame and apologize as if they did something wrong Vanity Fair just comes back with, a big old "Bitch, your parents were on the set. And they saw the photo, so don't blame us just because you didn't clear this shit with Disney first."

Another favorite feud? Angelina Jolie vs. Jennifer Aniston. I'll give you that this is probably a more media and fan based feud (as neither party really spoke out on the subject too much), but dammit, this bitch stole America's Sweetheart's husband! And that was NOT acceptable to the good people of this nation. Sure, that strumpet had a few people on her side because let's face it, Jolie and Pitt make a pretty hot, A-List couple. But fuck that. When Laura Croft stole Achilles away from Rachel Green, I knew exactly who I was siding with. Hell, I was so enthralled in this feud, that I supported Aniston's choice of a rebound with Vince Vaughn, AND even saw "The Breakup"! The crowning moment of this ripped from the headlines of the school newspaper feud was when Kitson came out with those wonderful "Team Jolie" and "Team Aniston" shirts. I never owned one, but I loved that fans could display their celebrity loyalties. I only wish those t-shirts could have custom made for whenver there was a feud going on in real life. Like, kids could wear different "Team Mom" or "Team Stepmom" onesies to show their allegiance.

I guess there's one other kind of feud. The make believe one. This would include the Paris Hilton vs. Nicole Ritchie (which proved for a wonderful season of The Simple Life which included this as the final words in the season finale:

Paris: (After finding out Richie had held a press conference to announce a fake pregnancy for Paris) I can't believe you'd do this.
Nicole: I can't believe you'd wear blue fur.

END SCENE.

This type of feud also includes the heated rivalry between Heidi Montag and Lauren Conrad. Which is really like saying that Jim and Dwight are in a "celebrity feud".

So, what looks to be the most interesting upcoming feud? Not sure if it's going to go anywhere, but the one I'm going to keep my eye on (and suggest you do the same) is Spencer Pratt (yes, from The Hills) vs. Mary Kate Olsen. It all started with this clip:


Go to 5:00 to see the "dirt". I think Mary Kate is adorable when she tries to skirt the questions. But now she's in BIIIG TWUBBLE MISTUR.

Spencer responded, "I don't really get why she'd use my name to get press for her little indie film that no one's going to see...I know I've made it in Hollywood when a famous troll is talking about me on Letterman...I forgive her, though. She's had to go through life as the less cute twin, which must be tough."

I'll keep you updated on this. My greatest hope is that Heidi or his little sister She-Spencer attack ASHLEY Olsen on the streets and get arrested. Now that'd be good TV.